buckeye Stories - We Will Always Have Tempe
THE REDNECK ROCKER RETURNS
The Subcommandante needs not appear on this blog anymore thanks to the Redneck Rocker. Gimme blood! Gimme blood pollution!!! Your favorite Mountain Dew-drinkin', hell-raisin' redneck is back, and it's seven minutes plus of pure FYAH. "I look at Daryl Clark and see the nightmares he can open for...
COUNTDOWN 2009: 31
A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure,...
CURIOUS INDEX, 3/2/2009
Fulmer Cuprising! Iowa; Ohio State; and Arkansas. All three strike with a boozy determination to bolt their teams into the Fulmer Cup race. Full update shortly with points awarded, but the most active weekend of the Cup season has a common thread running through it: the need to get crunk no...
FULMER CUPDATE: DANE COOK STEALS JOKES, LEAD FOR BALL STATE
Our much-delayed Fulmer Cupdate runneth over with Ball State leading the way thanks to his offences both as a person, and as a Ball State football player. Le board, courtesy of Brian, who as always is hung like Reggie Fuckin' Nelson. Notes without clarification or apologies follow. Notes: Dane...
JIM TRESSEL'S VACATION: THE RETURN HOME
Jim Tressel is finishing the final leg of his journey home from a worldwide walkabout. He sold his passport for entry into a man-dog fighting tournament in Afghanistan, but borders are but figments of the imagination for the brave and determined. THE UNITED STATES/MEXICAN BORDER. 9:12 a.m. MEXICAN...
JIM TRESSEL'S VACATION, PART TWO
A phone rings in a large, darkened house in Ohio. A worried looking woman picks up the phone. Woman: Hello? Man's voice on bad, third-world connection: Hey, honey. It's Jim. Woman: Jim...just tell me you'll be home soon. Man's voice: Oh, sure sweetie. But you know I have to do this every year, and...
CURIOUS INDEX, 10/17/08
Have you considered this pamphlet OH GOD OW OW OW OW STOP. BYU, Trey Parker; TCU, old lady at door. If you would like the story of the game in an easy image, imagine every single player on TCU's defense kicking every player on BYU's offense in the balls for four quarters, over, and over,...
ASK AN OHIO STATE FAN
O-H! From time to time we like to invite a member of the Ohio State Fanbase to comment on their team's campaign thus far in 2008. Today, we present Kevin Banks of Columbus, Ohio, a diehard Buckeye fan and guest contributor to EDSBS. Enjoy. I had to come on today because we have kind of a crisis in...
JIM TRESSEL'S FRANK PACKAGE TALK
Jim Tressel was asked about whether the inclusion of Terrelle Pryor at all limited what the Buckeyes could do on offense. The answer, presumably a simple one, instead revealed the soul of a man who both knows his limitations but embraces them as strengths. "I'm not looking to have the biggest...
WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA, MARY JO KILROY?
A debate about who's really a Buckeye, and who's working for the Canadian Muslim Terrorists over at the Sporting Blog.
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